The Devil is an A**

I hate him. Everytime I get close to having some happiness and fun, he has to come and pull the rug out from underneath me. I don't even get as close to the fun as I used to either. This guy, who I knew was a flake to begin with, just stood me up. Why did he arrange the date in the first place? It was last minute and I was a fool to accept. To make things worse, I started a fight with my ex-boyfriend over it (who I was trying to reconcile with-guess that's not going to happen now). I scared him and I think I hurt him a little. He told me he still loves me, but I don't even know if I believe that. I don't know what I believe about relationships anymore, about life... I'm still making the wrong choices though, and getting nowhere. I know I should just be patient, and the right gu will come when I'm ready. I'm clearly not ready at the moment. In fact, I'm feeling a little crazy.