Praying for a man...

Okay, so now that I've released this emotional baggage, I feel that I'm at the start of an entirely new journey. I don't know how to love, but I know I need to learn. I'm ready to humble myself in that regard. I need to learn how to maintain a relationship. I know they're hard work. I've never cared to keep one going past 3 months, but now I see it as kind of essential---in my life at least. I haven't been ready until now. I'm not saying I want to get married to anyone; I want a good relationship. A good friendship. A good sex life. Love would be nice too, but I think I need to get the mechanics down first. I don't even know how to use pet names or soften when a guy calls. It's just all combat for me. I haven't wanted to let anyone in. I think my subconscious may have been aware that I was picking the wrong guys for commitment anyway. Ugh. I need help--Divine help. Relationships are a responsibility, an asset that must be protected, and if we're lucky, they can grow in interest.